3 a.m. Again

The whole city is asleep

except the part of me

that keeps a list.

Things I said in 2019.

Things I should have said.

Things I said correctly

and the other person heard wrong

and I never corrected them

because what was the point.

The list is not getting shorter.

I have tried journaling.

I have tried the breathing.

I have tried the weighted blanket,

which helps with the body

but not with the archive.

At 4 a.m. I check my phone.

Nothing has happened.

Everything is the same.

I am the only person awake

in the world

with this exact inventory

of small regrets.